Therapeutic use of self involves both 'being' and 'doing' - i.e. our way of being with clients mixes with the doing that comes from our skills and techniques. More than this, a key message throughout the book is the focus on 'being with' rather than 'doing to'. Ultimately, it is the therapy relationship which is therapeutic and enables the therapy. If a client doesn't trust their therapist, the therapy isn't going anywhere. If the client doesn't feel safe, welcomed, listened to and respected, again the therapy isn't going anywhere. The questions for therapists to ask therefore need to be: 'How can I show my trustworthiness?' 'How can I ensure therapy is a safe, welcoming space?' 'How do I convey my listening, compassion, empathy, interest etc...?'